Listen up, world! I have stuff to say - a lot of stuff - and places to go. I am expecting that you'll help me get there and that you'll listen to all my tales and theories and tell me how wonderful they are. Because they are. And I, Samson, am wonderful, too. Just in case you didn't notice - let me tell you again: I am wonderful. I am now expecting to hear you exclaim, "Oh, he's wonderful, and he must become a forever part of my life!" Let's hear it. That's good.

Let me engage you. Notice my long, long legs - no stubby fellow here - basketball material, for sure - and much too valuable, stunning and special to be traded to the Timberwolves - unless they get their act together - which I don't expect they will any time soon. So let me engage you, not the Wolves. I put my long legs around your neck. Hear me purring in your ear? That's your bad ear? Well, then, I shall purr in the other one. Are we a team yet?

I don't intend to continue spending time in a kennel. That is not natural. It is not normal. What is natural and normal for a fine young orator like me is a big soft pillow in front of a warm south window. What is natural and normal is to get up from there and stretch and saunter into the kitchen or the mud room and find me some fine cat food - which you will place regularly in my bowl. Of course you will - and, then, I'll kiss your ear!

I'm told I'm in this kennel because there's a woman named Delilah out there in another room - and she wants to cut my fur. Can you imagine? Take scissors to this fine orange cape? I swing my tail and say, "That's not gonna happen!" Nope. What is going to happen is that you're going to come and get me and leave $100 with Feline Rescue. They'll tell you it covers the cost of the food I've been eating, which is true, but it also, I think, pays for the scissors that Delilah stole. Listen up! Let's go home!

PS: I currently reside at THE SHELTER (not in foster care). If you can't stop in but would like to know more about me, please call 651-642-5900, ext.3. Thanks!