“Well, well, well, another friendly person for me to court. Howdy, howdy, I’d like to follow you around a bit.” The name is Hastings. “Round round get around, I get around, Yeah, Get around round round I get around, Get around round round I get around, Wah wa ooo….” I guess it was all that gettin’ around that got me here – at Feline Rescue – instead of there – wherever I was before.
“So, you want to pet me? Want to play with me? Sure, you do – come on down here on this blanket, and let’s play Hastings’ games.” I know. I’m orange and white, and I sort of look like big Patrick over there. But I’m not him. I’m fast and sleek. Sure, he’s fast, but he’s not sleek – he steals all the pudding. He’s my great grand-uncle, though. He gets around, too.
That would be good – bring me that feather. I jump. Go ahead, move it higher, watch Hastings jump higher. Hee! How! How high am I! I have to be honest. I’d like the feather a whole lot more if it were attached to a bird – a fat, juicy, ugly bird. Yum! “Hastings, you need to understand – birds hate to be eaten. They really don’t like it.”
“They don’t? Why not? I like eating them….Oh. OK. As a matter of fact, yes, I have met an alligator, and, no, I certainly didn’t want it to eat me. So I just started thrashing my tail around – watch this – the way he did his, and he just figured I was another ‘gator. What? You think I’m fibbin’? Could be.”
“Do you mind if I take that pen? You do? Well, I think I’ll take it, anyway. I’m so cute and friendly and purry that you won’t resist me. And I need it to write my memoirs, dark dramas, sort of Elmore Leonard style. What? You think I’m too young for that?”
“Well, wah wa ooo…Why don’t you just pick me up and hold me and feel me purr? Admire my leather brown tail rings. Tail rings are special, wah wa ooo….”
Let’s get down to serious business. I’ve charmed you and stolen your pen. You’ve petted me, played with me, and purred with me. So how about you hand over $100 and take me home and be my forever people? That would be really good. I’d like it. I won’t eat bird or talk ‘gators. I will need to write my memoirs, though. The name is Hastings. Don’t forget.
PS: I currently reside at THE ADOPTION CENTER (not in foster care). If you can't stop in but would like to know more about me, please call 651-642-5900, ext.3. Thanks!
