I am very soft, very black, very friendly, and I'd like to wash your hand. Despite my name, I have nothing to do with mortgages - subprime or otherwise. I don't buy them. I don't pay them, either. I know - you were hoping I would. I might chew on one if you handed it to me. I have been Fannie Mae in all of my lives, and I'm only a couple of years old.

I hear people talking about me around here. They say, "Isn't she interesting? What in the world is she doing?" I do things that other cats only dream about. I'm creative, that's all. But I am getting the message that flipping my water bowl is not an artistic statement. You mean all I'm supposed to do is drink the water? I can't play with it? OK - give me a toy. I am an artist. You've heard of performance art? I do it. Come and watch.

I like cardboard boxes. I like to hide quietly, with just my big yellow eyes watching. I know you humans don't see well enough to notice my very black self in a box. Understand, though, I'm not in there because I'm scared - not scared of anything that I know of. I'm in there because it's part of my show. In the box - out of the box. You'll never know with Fanny Mae - a small streak of silliness - just enough to make you laugh when you need to. Please stop over and meet me; lifetime ticket to my show is only $100.

PS: I currently reside at THE SHELTER (not in foster care). If you can't stop in but would like to know more about me, please call 651-642-5900, ext.3. Thanks!