“Howdy, I may not look much like a country girl, but I am, at heart, a country girl. Even have a red neck! Of course, I also have red ears and feet and a sensuous, sinuous red tail with a white tip at the very end. I sing, and, if I’m in the right place, I dance. I do a lot of Dolly Parton covers, occasionally some Patsy Cline – but never at 3:15 AM, I promise!”

“I am Jeanette – look into my eyes. Do you feel yourself drawing in, softly settling into my mind? I do charms and spells and bring you into Jeanette World. You want to stay, don’t you? I am seeking people who promise to stay. I had some people. You know what they did? Moved away and left me behind – all alone. Nah, they weren’t raptured; they just left. I may have cast some spells afterwards. Just sayin…”

“I’m alert, active, brave, and animated. I think I’m about 4 years old, and I know I’m a good woman. I’m hoping that you have a nice plush green chait in which I could sleep and nap. Orange cat girls look so stunning when sleeping in green chairs. No chair? How about a green cat bed? That would be good; I could shed all the wonderful soft fur in my own green cat bed. That would be good!”

“I like toys. I like food. I am now liking you. Pardon me while I sail up and down and around this room one more time. Keeps me sleek – and keeps these other cats on their toes, including the extra ones if they have them. Do you still feel yourself disappearing into my supernatural cat eyes, charmed by my otherworldly face? How about this? Come to Feline Rescue with $120. Install a Dolly Parton ringtone on your phone – something cheery like ‘Coat of Many Colors’ – so I’ll know it’s you – my forever and ever peeps. OK?”