“Howdy! That’s what a guy is supposed to say when he wants to greet another guy, right? I named my self Yukon because I was headed for the Gold Rush. How was I to know it was over a long time ago? I saw a documentary on cable. I thought if one sees it, it’s real, and it’s now.”

“There I was, slapping my large paws down the street, with my pickaxe carefully tied in my tail, looking for the diggings. As you’ll notice, I’m a gold-colored cat, so I figured I’d blend right in. I think it was the pickaxe that attracted the attention of animal control. ‘C’mon, fellas,’ I said, ‘I’m a skinny, fluffy orange cat guy – when was the last time a cat grew up to be an axe murderer? I’m just hunting for gold to match my fur!”

“I’m young and friendly. Don’t mind a little arm wrestling with humans. Want to arm wrestle? C’mon! Even more fun is chasing the one-eyed orange whippersnapper through the tunnels! If I’m fast enough, I can pounce him before he reaches the end. ‘Ack! Ack!’ he says. Yukon chortles and takes off, ‘Yeeah!’ Oh, yes, I am amusing and playful. Sit and watch and fall in love.”

“Do you know that, when I arrived here, the Feline Rescue people put me in the jailhouse? A pink jailhouse! A fine orange guy cat in a pink jailhouse! My orangeness clashed terribly with that jailhouse. And then the cats behind the screen door sang, ‘He’s in the jailhouse now, he’s in the jailhouse now….’ Now I’m free to be the happy cheerful, moving and shaking fluffy orange fellow that I am meant to be.”

“I think you should adopt me – today, tomorrow, and forever. I’m a fun guy with a good story or two to tell. Maybe we can find a real, now Gold Rush. You don’t need gold to adopt me – just $120 – and some transportation to get us from here to your place. I’m Yukon – want to arm wrestle?  (Do you suppose we could go to North Carolina and visit my doppelganger?)”