“Hello! I’m Tarragon the Tortie, and I say I’m a very nice girl. Someone left me at Feline Rescue’s doorstep – not a nice thing to do, not at all. Especially since, um, the doorstep isn’t much of a doorstep – some wrinkled asphalt with a weed or two. I’m digressing – supposed to tell you about me – so let’s do that!”

“Tortie means tortoiseshell because I, and my kind, are said to have the blended, subtle colors of some kind of turtle. The turtle is pretty, so they say – so I guess I’m pretty, too. I do have many colors – a lot of black with some beige, some orange, some coral, a little brown, and a small dab of white, maybe yellow, here and there. I’m a walking artist’s palette, and I like myself this way.”

“I hear that salmon goes well with Tarragon – so, how about bringing me some? Some salmon, please. Don’t have to get fancy and decorate it. Just bring the fish to Tarragon – she knows what to do with it. Oh, yes, she does.”

“I want to be honest. I’m not very happy right now. How would you feel if someone dumped you at a thoroughly utilitarian doorstep? Even if they dumped you at the St. Paul Hotel? I may, because of that, be showing a bit of “Tortitude” – ‘hah’ and ‘hiss’ and ‘yes, I do mind if you do’ – but I don’t really mean it, not deep down in my true heart and soul.”

“I’d put my tortitude right back in my suitcase if I knew I had a real home and someone who loved me forever and ever. Someone who would bring me some salmon now and then. Oh, I could be, would be, blissful. Come meet me at Feline Rescue. Bring $120. I dream of you, my people. I am Tarragon, and I do go well with salmon.”